Sometimes a room can be more than a functional place to just sit or sleep or eat. While it may serve one or more of those purposes it can also become so much more. For my children their bedrooms are a place of peace, restoration and a sanctuary where they can be exactly who they are without any judgement or pressure. 

Their bedrooms are a place where they can think, recover safely from a seizure or operation, read alone, have one to one time with mum or do whatever they need to do to restore their brain and body to calm. Their rooms are not bulging with toys or busy wallpaper or full of noise and sensory overload. Instead they are simple, basic and only house what they treasure most. 

My son can’t be left alone even at ten. He can’t go to his room and play so there are no TV’s or video games because he can’t work either of them. His room is technology free and it’s a place where his mind and body can get that time to refresh and recharge. He can’t talk to me (he can’t talk at all) but when he is in his bedroom, we have magical calm moments of bonding that build our relationship and make it stronger. I read to him, I sit with him, and I hold him. While he doesn’t have cupboards full of toys in his room, because otherwise he would struggle to unwind before sleep, he does have a small box of plastic food and random little things he treasures that he adds to himself over time. He will often lie or sit on his bed after his bath and line up those random toys while he requests for me to count them or name them. He doesn’t do this anywhere else and it’s time I treasure with him every night. Time in his bedroom together is part of his routine that bonds us without ever needing words. When he’s older perhaps his routine will evolve or change, it will be this quality time with him in his bedroom at night that I will look back on and treasure. 

For my daughter who has anxiety and autism her bedroom is her sanctuary too. It’s her place to escape the pressures of being social, a place for her mind to clear to do homework in quietness, a place where she feels safe from her brother’s challenging behaviour, a place where she can open up and tell me her fears and worries in safety and privacy. It’s her place to keep her things safe, her personal space and her place of still in a world of chaos. It doesn’t matter to her that her room is small and the walls are plain. To her it’s where she can read, talk to me alone and where our hearts meet every evening before she goes to sleep. As I read to her, and our imaginations run together, she opens up about her troubles or we just colour in together like best friends. The world rarely hears her voice due to her selective mutism but in her room with me her voice is clear, understood and always accepted. It’s where a whisper speaks volumes and a touch heals deep wounds. 

My children don’t have expensive wardrobes or matching curtains and carpets. Many of their toys are second hand and sometimes the pillow cases don’t match their duvet covers. But none of that matters. They don’t spent hours building in their rooms or playing on electronics and there are no TV’s or even toy boxes. Yet their plain rooms with just special treasures or favourite books create a place of simplistic beauty that makes those rooms a sanctuary, a place to be that is calm and special and a place where love abounds. 

Sometimes when my children are at school, I sit in their rooms without touching anything and just sense the peace that comes from feeling their presence in their rooms. Their rooms are theirs and it’s an honour to spend time with them both in their individual sanctuaries where I get to see them at peace and relaxed. 

That’s what makes their bedrooms much more than just a place to sleep. That’s what makes their bedrooms so special. 

Read more blogs by Miriam over at FaithMummy, or read more Family Fund Bloggers here.